Sex and Relationships

Why Relationship Virgins Are On The Rise

They’re Young, Single and Maybe Ready to Mingle

By: Jennifer Weeks and Lucia Rossi


Over the course of the last few years, there has been an uprising of single adults, primarily in their 20’s, who have never been in a romantic relationship.

These adults are called “relationship virgins”.

Men and women who are relationship virgins have several reasons for being single, as well as never taking the commitment plunge in the past.

One common reason there are relationship virgins is simply because they may not have found someone worth dating.

It’s difficult to find someone who has the qualities you’re looking for.

Someone could be a relationship virgin because their standards and expectations are so high that no one has been able to reach them.

One can always dream, and no one says you’re undeserving of your prince or princess charming, but let’s be realistic, people aren’t perfect.

Someone could also be a relationship virgin because they’re young and aren’t ready to settle down.

This could be true for the majority of young adults, both men and women, because in our modern time period, people are getting married and having children at older ages.

Another reason people are relationship virgins is because some people enjoy sex more than commitment and romance.

Commitment can be frightening, and it’s often easier to avoid it by just focusing on the physical aspect of a relationship without actually having one. This doesn’t last for long because someone usually, and eventually, wants more.

People could also be relationship virgins because of insecurity. When you’re insecure, you think the worst about yourself and believe that you’re not worthy of love, when you are.

That lack of confidence isn’t sexy and shouldn’t stop you from being happy with someone. Insecurity can close you off to people which could give them the impression you’re unavailable.

Similar to insecurity, fear is another reason why people have never been in relationships .

Fear is a normal feeling when you have never been in or experienced love or a relationship. New things in general are scary.

It is also understandable if a person is afraid of relationships because they fear their heart will be broken. That’s just a risk you have to take.

Relating to this fear of heartbreak is also the fear of rejection. Nobody likes to be rejected, and it can happen often, but that doesn’t mean you give up. There is hope for everyone.

Rejection may discourage you and hurt your self-esteem but you must be brave in all aspects of your life, not just in love, and that means taking chances. It only hurts if you let it.

You never know when that “no” will become a “yes”, and you won’t know what could be until you find out. Think of it this way: you have nothing to lose.

Then again, there’s nothing wrong with being happy and independent. Some feel that it’s less stressful to be single and would rather get their own lives in order before committing.

This also coincides with people not having time for relationships.

In this regard, the only person you have to impress is yourself.

Relationships can be stressful because they are work. No matter how much you love someone, it doesn’t stop there. Relationships take effort that some people aren’t willing to give.

It’s also worth mentioning that it’s very possible that relationship virgins lack experience due to cultural or religious reasons imposed by their families, whether by choice or not.

Certain cultures or religions still allow arranged marriages or encourage the female to stay “pure”. In which case, they would not enter a relationship beforehand to put themselves at risk for all sorts of social issues.

Relationship virgins exist for good reasons and there’s nothing wrong with it.

If you haven’t experienced a real relationship yet, know that it’s okay and that your time will come.

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