The Rich Just Got Richer
By: Samiha Charles
Step aside peasants, there’s a new pod in town. Louis Vuitton just released the kraken on the AirPod community introducing the brand new Louis Vuitton Horizon earphones.
Retail priced at $995, you can now upgrade your look from privileged, millennial, douchebag status to high fashion douche status. The french fashion house has already been known to sell overpriced products for items that may or may not be worth it, but this is a different level of extra.
However, you can flex on your inferiors in 4 different colors, sleek black, monogram red, white and yellow and blue LV stripes. Louis Vuitton collaborated with Master & Dynamic to develop the system with “best in class audio qualities,” according to the Louis Vuitton website. But we’ll believe that when we hear it- That is, if we even get the chance to touch it.
These LV pods also come with a concave charger case in black or white engraved with the traditional Louis Vuitton symbols on the lid. The pods listening time extends to about 3 and a half hours per charge with up to 10 hours of battery life.
These bluetooth headphones are also suitable for any apple or android devices. Because what better way to stunt on android haters than coming in with a $995 ear phone?
As many are aware, Apple came out with their apple airpods only 3 years ago and have since been the next best thing since cheese on rice.
Twitter and Instagram communities helped make the sensation with memes mocking AirPods users and their privileged ego, but once these babies are released, this could potentially change the game significantly not just for earpod users but for twitter and instagram communities that dedicate their lives to bashing others for their class wealth.
Now I’m sure many of you hypebeasts are ready to cash out whatever is left in your mom’s bank account to get these but they haven’t officially released to retailers yet.
Which is another thing, there is no official release date for when these overpriced earphones will come out, yet the website still lists the items and are constantly sold out. However, it’s been rumored to be released later on this year.
In the meantime, you can head on down eBay to purchase these earbuds ranging from $1,000- $3,000. Isn’t it funny how the same item can be resold for twice as much as the original price?
I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather pay less for such a basic name brand product instead of more. But I digress, if you really want to go for the signature foreign exchange student look, why not go all out on materialistic things such as this. After all, happiness can be bought for a small loan of a couple thousand dollars, right?
Celebrities like Miley Cyrus, Lil Uzi, Lil Yachty, and Travis Scott have even been spotted wearing Louis Vuitton’s earbuds, on their instagrams.
Lil Yachty even posted a video of a memorial service for his previous Apple airpods and the “rebirth” of a LV earbuds that apparently signifies wealth.
But these brand promotions are nothing new to these celebrities as they advertise the French designer’s products almost regularly on their instagrams and in their shows.
Miley Cyrus has even posted a selfie on her IG story of her wearing a Louis Vuitton surgical mask while she had a case of the flu on March 27. I suppose hat alone sums up the type of culture we live in.
Though there’s no telling what the compensation will be for future LV Horizon earphone users who lose their earphones, we know one thing, whoever finds them will be one lucky guy.
And while Apple airpods users may not speak broke, to Louis Vuitton Users, broke’s not even in their vocabulary.
Categories: April Fools!, Lifestyles
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