Sex and Relationships

Be Your Own Second Half

Finding Happiness Regardless of Relationship Status

By: Lauren Silverman

On your journey to self-fulfillment, surround yourself with positive people. Photo Credit:

Looking for your soulmate or what people commonly refer to as your ‘second half?’ Look no further than yourself.

Relationships are wonderful because of the close, loving connection you create with someone you truly care about. But be careful not to lose yourself in this difficult search.

There are several ways to tell if you are not ready for a relationship. One way is by deciding how you feel when you are on your own. If you cannot bear the idea of spending time alone, you may not be ready to find a partner; it is essential to be comfortable with yourself.

If you are not comfortable with the idea of being on your own, you may not make wise decisions about who you want to spend your time with, favoring quantity over quality. In other words, you might date people simply because they prevent you from being alone, which will negatively impact your mental health.

Though it may be a difficult concept to learn, self-sufficiency is important and will better prepare you if you decide to start a relationship with someone in the future.

So, how can you start your journey to self-fulfillment? You must first take care of yourself.

Regardless of whether or not you are looking for a relationship (or whether or not you are in one), you deserve to manage your health in order to live as healthily as possible. You must become active in improving your life, removing the negative and embracing the good.

Another important part of self-care is making sure your priorities are in order. Are you taking extra time to take care of yourself, but with the sole intention of impressing someone else? This will only hurt you; it takes practice to let yourself become an inspiration, but it is essential nonetheless.

Mindfulness is essential in your journey to self-fulfillment. Don’t let your negative emotions run away from you.

If you are feeling upset or angry, acknowledge your circumstances and analyze why you might be feeling this way.  

The goal is not to eliminate negative emotions. Rather, you need to accept that you can’t be happy every second of the day, and that you will experience challenges, but you can calm yourself and analyze your feelings if you are mindful.

Mindfulness will allow you to appreciate all emotions while still focusing on your happiness.

Happiness is cultivated in the roots of your daily activities, so if your days are filled with nothing but stress, it will be difficult to find joy. If you cannot rid yourself of stressful events (such as school and work), find places to add small bits of happiness to your day.

For example, stop and grab your favorite beverage before class, or meet one of your best friends after work.

Of course, happiness is also affected by the people around you, such as friends and family. Make sure you surround yourself with people you care about. If they make you feel badly about yourself, you might want to find better company.

Similarly, don’t wait for relationships to bring happiness into your life. While they can be wonderful, they also bring a handful of unique challenges, and they will not automatically solve all of your problems.

Take yourself out! Don’t restrict yourself because you’d rather wait and share the experiences with someone else. There will be plenty of time for that in the future.

Enjoy your own company. When you achieve mindfulness and can successfully evaluate your happiness, your self-confidence will flourish. And with a healthier mindset, you’ll be ready for anything, with or without a relationship.

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