Don’t Overthink, Just Do It!
By: Philip Sanzone
We converse everyday. It is an intrinsic part of society. Sometimes, it can be hard to start a meaningful conversation and come up with funny or even interesting topics to talk about.
Building a stable foundation for a blossoming relationship is hard, but not every relationship has to start from a stable foundation. Sometimes, they start off rocky and other times you might have even started out hating the person.
Having the ability to talk and let others join the in on conversation instead of taking over it can help create a back and forth connection that is essential for a positive experience.
You’ll want to define the conversation and figure out what mutual interest there is between you two. If you find something that is a passion like a hobby or pastime, it is something you can both bond over. Sometimes, if you click with someone a conversation can take off and literally be about nothing in particular.
The main cliche as to why people don’t talk as much now is phone usage and people finding it awkward to approach someone. Putting down your phone and actually taking an interest in others is what will help gravitate a person to you.
Sounding and looking interested and actually being interested are two very different things. Sometimes you can be intrigued, but show no real sign of it. Also, being able to read a situation and seeing if someone else shows interest is was makes it a daunting task.
If you can tell they don’t want to talk, then just admit defeat. There are just some conversations that you usually wouldn’t talk about with an acquaintance. Acquaintances are usually people that you go to school or work with.
Acquaintances can turn into friends. If you decide to develop the relationship, that is up to both the individual and their interest. There is also a difference between nice, too nice, and liking a person.
Many people misinterpret niceness akin to liking them.This is something that if you want to start a relationship with someone and want to make it genuine, not confusing the two will be imperative.
Not saying that everyone does it, but from experience many people I know get confused with this. Making the conversation a neutral and cohesive string of sentences makes for a fun and interesting conversation.
Not everyone is going to like you, but nothing is wrong with talking to people that you just met. Being able to openly socialize helps you see other people, and it develops your sense to be able to see and judge people more accurately.
Seeing many different types of people and backgrounds expands the mind to what interests you. Not everyone you talk to will be interesting, nor will they actually like you at the end of the conversation.
But the experience gained from that is immense. Personally, when I hear ‘vacation’ the first thing that comes to mind is my computer and staying at home. For someone writing an article on how to talk to people, that sounds anti-social.
When in a social setting, I might not talk like I would with close friends. That is a given: acting like everyone in the room is a close friend might mess up first impressions.
Also, being honest is a good thing, but try not to tell them your life story. Being honest doesn’t have to mean telling people your autobiography.
Also, don’t forget reading situations and feeling comfortable comes easy for some and is hard for others. Sometimes, people just come to a lose when meeting new faces, and there are others who are overly shy.
The first step is starting a conversation with someone new and building social skills and relationship skills up from there. Even social media can help, but doing it in person creates a dynamic that is way different than talking online.
Communication isn’t impossible, and everyone can learn it with a little practice.
Categories: Sex and Relationships