Life doesn’t end just because your relationship does
By: Jennifer Weeks
The ending to a relationship is always the worst. It can be quite painful and hard to do if you were in a long relationship. Breakups are always hard, regardless of whether you ended it or not.
And let’s not forget the complications of having to see your ex move on with someone else. Breakups are anxiously avoided, but here are some steps to help you get over that difficult time in your life.
One, my personal favorite: Think of the breakup as a positive thing. Everything happens for a reason! Maybe he or she was not the one for you, the person you were meant to be with. That relationship could have been preparing you for something better. The right person that you are meant to share your life with is still out there.
Two, don’t feel sorry for yourself: Don’t sit on the couch in your jammies, crying into a pint of ice cream. You are better than that. Know your worth, and know that that person wasn’t worth your time.
Three, get rid of their stuff: And I don’t mean just their phone number and social media pages. I mean pictures, memories and any gifts that were given to you.
Four, burn the shit! You will feel so much better. Burn whatever memorabilia you have of them, especially pictures. Physically ridding yourself of the memories is a helpful way of moving on.
Five, give yourself some “me time”: Everyone needs some “me time” occasionally. Just some time to give yourself a bit of undivided attention. It can also be good for you to let your body destress and just focus on yourself. While doing so, you can focus on what’s ahead of you.
Six, write down everything that annoyed you about your ex, kind of like a pet peeve list, or what went wrong in your relationship. This will help you come to terms with why it ended.
Seven, get a new hobby: Fill your time with something you enjoy. Cooking, knitting, writing or my personal favorite, reading. Any free time you have, you know your mind is going to wander to your ex, especially if you two spent all your free time with together.
Eight, vent about it! Whether it’s in a journal or just talking to someone, let it all out. It might be therapeutic to write a letter to your ex, or email. And I mean one that you don’t send, just a letter email that you write and vent out all your feelings. It will feel good afterwards
Nine, get back out there: Now you might feel discouraged or your self-confidence level may have plummeted due to your breakup, but that’s okay. You’ve got this! If you’re not completely ready to get back out there, then that’s okay too. You can always join some online dating sites to dip your toes in the water, maybe flirt with some local guys.
Ten, if you and your ex agreed to end your relationship but agreed to be friends–don’t! Cut off all contact with them, friendwise, on social media and most of all, physically. It’s just going to make you vulnerable, wishing to go back to the way things were. Let’s face it, can you and your ex really be friends?
Eleven, do things he/she hated: For instance, if they hated pineapple pizza, then eat it! If they hated bowling, bowl at least once a week. Find something they hated and learn to love it.
Twelve, find closure: Learn to accept that it’s over between you two. Try to come to terms with knowing that it is a chapter ended and life continues. It’s all about writing a story that they weren’t meant to be in.
I hope this helps and wish you all the best moving on from your ex. Just know your worth and there is a reason your relationship ended. Look at it as a blessing and not a loss!
Categories: Sex and Relationships